Tuesday, June 17, 2008

in a fog




I’ve been in a fog the last few months, deep heavy fog – I’ve emerged now and then to do what needed doing but not long enough to get anything really good happening.

This year I’ve been trying to take part in the 366 group on Flickr, taking a photo a day for the whole year – that’s not been easy, wasting so much time setting up still life things, then downloading and I hate the photos, they are fuzzy, blurry, out of focus, wrong light wrong everything.

So then I set up yet another blog just for the daily photos, problems happen
when I post a week of photos together and blogger puts them all under the one day, then I have to log in and separate them, anal I know, but I have to have them ‘right’ then that’s all too hard, so I scrub that blog.

I wander the halls of Flickr, peering into doors which lead me to other doors and other halls and everyone is SO smart, so artistic, so creative. I spend so much time there that I have no time for anything else.

Flickr leads me to blogs where I spend more time….and they lead me to groups that I join, which means more internet, more more more.

I leave my real life groups because their days come around so fast and I can’t rouse myself to make the effort to leave the house and go to them.

My days are counted now not by what I’ve achieved but by how many hours I sit in front of the computer

My friend says I’ve caught her depression, maybe, don’t know, I’ve never had it before.

I know about the Blogging without Obligation thing, but I do feel an obligation (The Blog has been a small part of my life since I started on LJ in 2002) and I feel a need to apologise when I disappear.
Especially when I come back and find that Annica and Paula have both been to visit and have very sweetly given me the Sweet Home blogger award - thank you both.

So I'll give myself a good shake, stop whining, brush out some cobwebs (or maybe spray them silver) and try to get moving again

2 comments:

paulahewitt said...

I know how you feel - i cycle through depression and bouts of enthusiasm with boring regularity. The time spent on the computer seems to sap any creativity right out of me - im not sure how others can blog (or post to flickr of whatever) and be creative as well. its one or the other for me!

Erica said...

thanks Paula, I appreciate knowing I'm not on my own with this

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